Coping Mechanisms for a Spender-Saver Relationship
Over those first several months of the relationship it became QUITE our money personalities were: she was a saver and I was a spender. It sounds like a disastrous relationship, but it doesn't have to be! Check out what to do when a spender and saver marry - and how it'll all work out. I'm A Spender, My Husband's A Saver: How We Make It Work. LearnVest . RELATED: 8 Financial Red Flags In a Relationship. Sure, it's been.
So, how can you make it work? Reveal your money baggage There's a reason why one person goes on a shopping spree after a bad day, while another clings to every dollar earned. A lot of our relationship with money stems from what we learned directly and indirectly from our childhood.
Money habits are usually influenced by parents, religion, teachers, friends and now social media," said Judith Gruber, a psychotherapist who often works with couples and individuals over money issues.
A spender marries a saver — now what?
The money guide for unmarried couples She added that spenders tend to be very generous with themselves and others while a saver might equate money with security.
Knowing the history of your partner's money habits can help you be more understanding and compassionate to their behaviors.
Create a budget that you both can live with Once you have a better understanding of your significant other's relationship with money, sit down and create a budget that works for both parties.
Break down how much income you have coming in each month, your fixed expenses like housing, transportation and food, and also discretionary spending like entertainment, dinning out and travel. The next step is figuring out what each person is comfortable spending and saving each month and reconciling those amounts.
The more conservative person should feel comfortable with the spending and the spender shouldn't feel overly constrained. The newest ways to save together that are actually age old For some couples, experts suggested having separate checking accounts outside of their shared savings and checking accounts can help keep the financial peace.
For instance, if both contribute to a checking account that pays for split expenses like housing, car, insurance, child care and groceries, then each couple would also have their own checking account with money to spend or not as they see fit.
I've set out on a mission, listing a few helpful tips, to help young couples openly discuss finances no matter what their spending habits may be. Budgeting Basics Today, there are more resources available than ever before to help couples budget and track their expenses.
BBC - Capital - A spender marries a saver — now what?
Whether a couple is web savvy, or likes sticking to pencil and paper, tracking everyday expenses is the first priority to figuring out a budget. Keeping track of where your money goes for one month is a good rule of thumb for nailing down expenses. One great online expense tracker is Mint. Everyday expenses can be entered and tracked and Mint also offers colorful charts to help those visual learners.
Quicken and Quickbooks are two software programs that I use. I enter my expenses on the checkbook register digitally, categorize each expense I set up the categories when I first loaded the programthen at the end of the month I can pull a report that shows where my money is going. Seeing where most of my money goes rent and utilities allows me to decide if I'm paying too much for electricity, water, or phone service. I usually delegate the task of calling companies for better rates to my husband.
He gladly takes on the challenge and often can reduce our rates. Tracking my expenses also helps me see where I can trim down my budget and save money. For instance, my Starbucks portion of the pie chart has gotten a little out of control. Using this as a guide, I can reevaluate my budget and decide if I need to cut back on certain expenses and opt out of that second daily drink. Tracking expenses and forming a budget can help guide a spender into reducing their spending habits, allowing the saver to feel a bit more in control.
Sharing Purchasing Power Once a couple has a handle on their expenses and has a rough budget outlined, it's time to discuss purchasing habits. If the spender is secretly spending more than what the couple can afford, the saver will be beside themselves and may not be able to amicably resolve the issue.
Open discussion is a must and can be done through various ways including: Deciding how much of the combined income will be set aside for frivolous or splurge purchases.
Once that monthly limit has been met, the spender is asked to give up their credit or debit cards.